Apocalypse 2022 #1
It's been said so many times that it's practically a cliché now – childbirth is a miracle. Conception, growth, the way a woman's body expands to carry and protect the baby until it's ready to be born. Not to mention the act of birth itself. An opening that normally only accommodates a few inches in diameter suddenly stretches large enough to allow AN ENTIRE BABY HUMAN to emerge. All my life, I held the belief that birthing a child had to be one of the most amazing moments in a woman's life.
But I wasn't ready.
I mean, I was ready to meet my son. I was ready to not be pregnant anymore, I was so uncomfortable the last week or two. But I wasn't ready for how truly, truly miraculous the whole thing really is. A child grew inside me for nine months, and came out of me fully intact, alive, and perfect.
My son is perfect.
The moment the nurse handed Nugget to me, I had never been so in love, or so scared. This tiny, fragile thing, that had been protected inside my body, was now outside... and it was my job to continue to protect him. I know, I'm not alone in that job. I have Dom of course. Wyatt and Amy. Jaina. Sienna. But I'm his mother. At the end of the day, his health, his well-being, comes down to me.
As much as he was wanted the moment I knew he was coming, I've been afraid I'm not qualified for the job ever since he was born. Dom of course tells me I'm being silly. I've always loved children, everyone in my life knows that. But all of the kids I've taken care of before belonged to someone else. I had someone to turn to if I didn't know what to do. This time? It's all on me. And that terrifies me. This is the one thing in my life that I absolutely cannot screw up. That's a lot of pressure on someone like me. I know you know what I mean.
I needed help. Professional help. Dom and I decided to hire a live-in caretaker. Sometimes called an au pair, or a nanny. I don't like the term nanny for that job, cause where I grew up, Nanny is a name often given to one's godmother. My own Nanny passed away when I was little, and to me, calling someone that word who doesn't have that kind of relationship is just wrong. So... caretaker it is. When Dom and I first discussed hiring someone, the main reason for it was because we both travel a lot for our jobs, and once the newborn period was over and we would both go back to work, there was no way we could travel with him and not have help. I first asked Scotty if he would be willing to do so, and in typical Scotty fashion, replied, “Breezy, I love you... but there is no way I am looking after anyone's spawn. You know damn well my patience is too thin for that.” So, that was out. Besides, the Scott Burnside Brand had gained a lot of traction while I was pregnant and Scotty wasn't on the road with me. It wouldn't have been fair to seriously expect him to drop all of that for me. Again.
So, Dom and I placed an ad with a staffing agency, highly recommended by one of Dom's movie friends who also lives in the city. At first I declared that it didn't matter to me if the caretaker was a man or a woman, as long as they were qualified and we seemed to get along. But after the first man we interviewed, I realized I could never be comfortable with that. This would be a person living in our home, intertwined in our personal life, and responsible for my most precious possession. I could never trust a man I barely knew with any of that. Not after what happened to me last year. I was still working on trusting some men I've known for years just giving me a friendly hug. So... hiring a man for the job was out. I hated being so discriminatory, but I couldn't help it.
After a few interviews, we found who we thought was the perfect woman for the job – Nora Safford. She's a few years younger than me, no kids of her own, and looking to make money to save up to go to school. Our offered salary was generous, so by the time we felt we didn't need her services anymore, she should have more than enough for the school courses she wanted. Nora is cute, with long, straight, jet black hair and green eyes. The fashion industry would probably call her plump, but I think she's pretty fit. She moved in about a week before I gave birth, into the bedroom that was Jaina's before she bought her own condo. It's across the hall from the nursery, the bedroom next to mine and Dom's. We worked out a schedule, Nora's off hours and days for doing her own thing.
After Heath arrived, Nora was like an angel (no offense to Sienna). I don't know how we would have made it the first week without her. Feedings every hour or two, middle of the night waking. I have all the respect in the world for every woman who's done this on her own, without a caretaker to help, and especially if she is also without the baby's father in the picture. I think I would have had a nervous breakdown, and I am deeply grateful that we are privileged and wealthy enough to afford to have Nora around. Her presence settled my anxiety about being able to protect this tiny human. Nora was someone trained in baby care that I could ask for help.
{{Tuesday, May 31
Kenner, LA
Bree's bedroom}}
It was early afternoon, and I had laid down for a nap. Nora was off today until 4 PM, she asked for the time off to go with her mom to a doctor's appointment. Heath had been a little fussy in the morning but nothing I couldn't handle. Still, it was only a month after he was born and me and my body were still recovering. I have a bassinet in our bedroom, parked against the wall on my side of the bed, just on the other side of my nightstand. I had laid Heath there after getting him to sleep, and gotten in bed myself. His afternoon naps were usually at least three hours now, and I needed that rest, too.
I don't know how long I had been sleeping when I wake up, but the sunlight through the window looks like late afternoon. The room is quiet. Too quiet. I don't hear the sound of a tiny human breathing that I am now used to. I sit up and glance over to the bassinet.
It's empty.
Oh my God, it's empty!
Now fully awake, I jump out of bed and first look on the floor, thinking Heath had fallen out. Obviously he isn't on the floor, and I shake my head at myself for such a stupid thought. Four-week old babies can't even turn over, much less climb out of anything. So... where is he?
“Nugget?”
I still hear nothing. I look around the room. Not on my bed. Or the couch at the foot of the bed. Or the arm chair on Dom's side of the bed.
“Heath?” I walk around frantic. “Heath!”
My baby is gone. My son is gone!
“Where are you?!”
I must have been yelling louder than I thought. The bedroom door swings open hard and Dom comes in.
“Cakes? Are you okay? You're yell-”
“He's missing!”
“What?” My husband looks utterly confused.
“Heath! He's gone! I just woke up and he's not where I left him! Is Nora here? Did she- no wait, she was off... so where-”
Dom walks up to me and holds me by both upper arms. “Babe. He's fine. I took him out.”
“You... what?”
“He woke up and cried, so I took him out to feed him so he wouldn't wake you up. He's in his crib, sleeping again.”
I blink a few times, his words sinking in. I had been half asleep still when I saw the empty bassinet and my head was just starting to become clear. “Really?”
Dom grins. “Of course. Come on, I'll show you.”
Dom grabs my hand and leads me out of our bedroom and next door into the nursery. And then I hear it. That little sound. Baby breaths. Heath lays in his crib, sound asleep, swaddled up in a blanket that his Gammy (Ms. Brenda) made for him. I breathe deep and smile at him. I feel Dom hug me from behind. Only he could get away with that these days. I lean back into him, embarrassed for how I acted.
“Can I ask you something?” I nod without looking back. “When you woke up and saw the bassinet empty... why was your first thought that he was missing?”
“I... I don't know. My usual over-reaction thing?”
“Bree.”
I sigh. I do usually over-react, even moreso since I was assaulted last year. But Dom knows this isn't that. He knows me too well. “It's just... look at him. He's a tiny, fragile, breathing piece of me, outside of my body. Unattached, untethered. Just.... out here. I knew where I left him and I woke up and he wasn't there, and...” I shake my head, knowing it sounds ridiculous. “I guess I'm still adjusting to him being out in the world instead of in here.” I put a hand over my stomach. I hate how soft it still feels. But plenty of time to work on that. Dom holds me closer, reaching around to put his hand on top of mine.
“I'd say I understand, but I don't think I can, not completely.”
“He's part of you too, you know.”
“I know... but my role in making him was minor compared to yours.”
I laugh a little, a joke coming to mind. “That's true, when you put him in me, he was much smaller than when he came out.”
Dom laughs, resting his forehead on my shoulder. “Ridiculous. But true.” He kisses the side of my face. “Can you do me a favor though? Try not to assume the worst any time he's in not in your direct line of sight?”
“I'll try.”
“I mean, one day he'll be going to day care and even school, and you'll need to be adjusted to him being an autonomous being by then.” I can hear the teasing in his voice, but he's not wrong.
“Ugh, don't make me think about that. I'm already anxious about going back to work, and that's months from now.”
A tiny whiney sound comes from Heath, and Dom and I both step back away from the crib, realizing our talking likely disturbed him. We don't want him to wake up, so we go to the other side of the room and sit on the couch. Once comfortable, Dom picks up where we left off, in a quiet tone.
“Now going to work? That I can understand. I'm not really looking forward to leaving you both for a week for the film promotion.” Deep Cover 2 was set to be released in about six weeks, so Dom and his co-stars, including Kennedy Street, are meeting in Los Angeles next week for photo calls, interviews, TV appearances, the usual movie stuff.
“I know you're not, and I'd love to be there with you but I'm just not comfortable traveling with him yet. He's so little.”
“I get it. He shouldn't be around a ton of people that aren't family this young anyway. Especially these days.”
“Just tell yourself what I have been... it's only a week.” I'm not sure that actually has made me feel better about it, but I wasn't gonna say that.
“That, and a few days here and there, until premiere week. Thankfully the studio agreed to do that here. You can come, and Heath can stay with Nora.”
“That's what I was thinking. I...” My words are cut off by a yawn. “Sorry...”
“Maybe you should to back to bed while he's still sleeping.”
“You think I could? Is Nora here yet? I don't even know what time it is.”
“Yeah, she got here about half an hour ago. She was getting settled when I heard him.”
“Okay... I think I will go lay down a little while longer then.”
I get up, and Dom follows me. I take a peek at my son in the crib. Still sleeping. I want to kiss his forehead but it would probably wake him up. Dom and I quietly go back to our bedroom, leaving both bedroom doors open a crack. I get in bed and lay down. I grin a little as Dom sits on his side and starts pulling his shoes off.
“What are you doing?”
“I'm gonna take a nap with my wife. Is that okay?” He grins back.
“Um... Nora's here, right?” I realized as soon as the words came out that he just told me she was.
“Yes. She'll be listening for him, the monitors are on.” Dom swings his legs up into bed and scoots over close to me. I lean into him and he holds me.
I think afternoon naps are my favorite. Now, if I could just learn to not be so paranoid.
{{Monday June 6
New Orleans
Lisa Kagan's office}}
Dom and I are sitting in the waiting area of his agent, Lisa Kagan's, office. She called him yesterday morning and asked us to come in for a meeting. Dom assumed it had something to do with his promotional stuff he's leaving for tomorrow, and questioned why I had to come, too. Lisa apologized but said everything would be made clear in the meeting. So, Nora has Heath at home and Dom and I are here. He's been going over his LA itinerary and I've been playing a dumb bubble-shooter game on my phone. We've been waiting about twenty minutes. I smile proudly at myself for beating the level I've been stuck on for a few days. Just then, the office door opens. I look up out of curiosity, and my eyes widen as I watch Kennedy Street walk in. I haven't seen her in months, not since Dom and I were in LA for the movie's wrap party. I was pregnant but not showing yet, or at least not very much. Kennedy gives me a little smile.
“Hey honey. Figured you two would be here.”
“Hi Kennedy... I had no idea you were coming. They called you to New Orleans from LA for this?” Dom sounds incredulous.
“I know, right? Must be a big deal. I wasn't happy about it but I was told it was basically mandatory.” Kennedy turns to me. “They asked you to be here, too?”
“Yeah. That's what I'm confused about. I have nothing to do with the movie.” I shrugged a little.
“Right? Oh by the way, I haven't seen you lately, congrats on your little boy.”
Both Dom and I smile. “Thank you.”
“Have any pictures?”
“Only about a hundred.” I close the game on my phone and open the gallery, then hand it over. As Kennedy swipes through about twenty different angles of Heath just sleeping, with a grin on her face, I think about my relationship with her. We used to hate each other, until she and Dom were working on the first Deep Cover. He and I had a really big fight and he wasn't talking to me. Kennedy stuck her nose in and called me, to basically tell me about myself. I was mad at her at the time (and at Amy for giving her my number) but if she hadn't said anything, I'm not sure Dom and I would have gotten through that rough spot. Afterwards, Kennedy and I saw each other a lot during movie events and eventually became friends. She even came to our wedding. Then... she returned to SCW, stuck her nose into my business with Ravyn, and this time.. it wasn't nice. She said terrible things to and about me, claiming it was all in the spirit of competition, and some of it for my own good. We had a triple threat at Rise to Greatness a year ago – Kennedy, me, and Ravyn. Kennedy ended up winning by pinning Ravyn. I didn't know what to think of her after that, she claimed we were friends but I didn't understand how a friend could act that way to someone and call them a friend. Then... I was pregnant. Then, Deep Cover 2 was in production. I was in LA with Dom during filming, and in that time Kennedy and I had another conversation. She explained to me that she was in a bad place at the time, had just left her ex-husband Jonathan Knots, and was lashing out at everyone. She apologized and asked me to forgive her. I was still upset, but I had recently had something of a change in perspective myself, and had been asking people to give me a chance to prove I could be better. I'd have been a hypocrite if I didn't give her that same chance. So, I accepted the apology, and here we are. Kennedy and I will never be besties like me and Sienna, or even me and Liz, better known to the wrestling world as Datura. But since that talk we've been on good terms and make chit chat when we see each other.
Kennedy hands me my phone back with a smile. “He's beautiful, honey.”
“Of course he is, he looks like his daddy.”
“Maybe... I think he has your nose though.”
I'm not sure if she means that as a compliment or not, and I don't get to find out because the door opens again, and three men in suits enter. They have an 'official' look about them, carrying briefcases and I'm almost positive one of them has a gun holstered on his hip under his jacket. They give us curt nods, but don't bother to sit. Right behind him, Mikey Easton, the third main star in the movies, and the director Gary Westbrook walk in. Dom and I exchange a look, then greet them politely.
About a minute later, Lisa comes out of the door to her office.
“Great, you're all here. Good morning. Please, come in here.”
Dom, Kennedy, and I get up and follow the suits into Lisa's office. She's brought extra chairs in from her private office so that everyone has a seat. The suits and Gary sit alongside Lisa's desk, facing myself, Dom, Kennedy, and Mikey. The look on Mikey's face tells me he has no idea what's going on either. Lisa clears her throat politely.
“Thank you all for coming. I know it was short notice for some of you. Most of you know each other, but I'd like for these gentleman here to introduce themselves.” Lisa gestures to the suits. The man who looks the oldest speaks first.
“Good morning. Dom, Mikey, we've met. For the rest of you, I'm Gregory Patton, one of the film's post-production producers.”
The man with the briefcase next. “Hi, my name is Neil Greywood, I'm an attorney representing Lionsgate Studios.” Finally, the man with the gun introduces himself.
“Detective Jeff Morrison, LAPD.” That explains the gun. But literally nothing else. Lawyers and police? Lisa looks around a bit, then sits on the end of her desk, rather than behind it.
“I can see that you're all confused as to what's going on here. Before we explain, we need you all to acknowledge that everything said in this office today needs to remain confidential. Are we agreed on that?” The four of us who know nothing yet nod to Lisa's request. “Great. Now-”
“Hang on a moment, aren't we missing someone? Why isn't Elias here?” Dom means Elias Stone, the fourth main cast member of Deep Cover 2. He plays a prison guard who helps Mikey Easton's character still run his gang from in jail. Dom's character ends up flipping him to the police's side.
“Mr. Stone is the reason we are all here today. Neil?” Lisa gestures to the lawyer.
“That's correct. Elias Stone isn't here, because this meeting is about him. I'm not going to sugarcoat this issue, and I apologize to the ladies if I'm too blunt. In the last week, Mr. Stone has been accused by three female film techs of inappropriate behavior and sexual harassment.”
I gasp, my hand flying up to cover my mouth. I hear Kennedy whisper “oh no.” Dom grabs my other hand.
“What? Elias? Really?” Dom sounds completely stunned.
“Unfortunately, yes. Detective?” Neil looks towards Morrison.
“Correct. I have the reports here, it's all on record and official. One female made a report first on Wednesday of last week. She named a few others who she had knowledge of having similar experiences. On investigating, we found two other females willing to come forward as well. There were two more who corroborated, but did not want to be on record.”
“That rotten motherfuc- sorry...” Mikey, who normally sounds gruff on a good day, practically growled.
I glace at Dom and he's shaking his head. “I... I can't believe it. I worked with him every day for two months, he just never seemed like that kind of guy.”
“They usually don't, until they are.” Gary, the director, hasn't said a word yet, but he gives me a compassionate look. Everyone knows what happened to me, I think he's sorry that I have to hear this. I still don't know why I'm here, though. I didn't work on the movie. Detective Morrison nods at Neil, the producer, tagging him back into the conversation.
“Therefore... in light of these allegations and the investigation that's forthcoming, the studio has decided it would be imprudent to go forward with the film's release.”
Finally Gary speaks. “As much as it pains me to have all of our hard work set aside, I agree with the decision. We can't go into full promotion mode while Stone is being investigated for criminal acts.”
“No, of course not...” Dom's voice sounds far away. I can tell he's upset, but he understands. More than most.
“This is an outrage. An absolute outrage!” Kennedy seems almost hysterical.
“Yes, Ms, Street, it is.” Gary says with reproach. “It's an outrage that someone would act this way towards women.”
“Allegedly,” Detective Morrison reminds us.
“Right, allegedly. But there's three of 'em.” Mikey adds.
“Alright, we'll get to that in a moment. Let's finish the topic of the film, yes?” Gary says. Everyone nods or gives a sound of agreement. Gary gestures to Gregory, the producer, who hasn't spoken much.
“Right, so what happens is this. The film is done, obviously, as we were ready to move forward next week. But, for now it'll go on a shelf in a vault. It'll sit there until the full investigation is done. Depending on the outcome of that, it'll either remain on that shelf as a dead film. Or, if this turns out to be a misunderstanding or nothing, it may be released next year sometime, after this whole story dies down.”
“Hold on honey, can't we just recast him and reshoot his scenes?”
Gary speaks up. “We thought about that, but it was clear pretty quickly that it would be impossible. Elias is in almost fifty percent of the film. We'd be reshooting half the movie. Not only that, some of the sets have been torn down, we wrapped almost a year ago. That would have to be rebuilt... it would cost entirely too much. We'd lose more money redoing everything than we will just shelving the film.”
I hear Dom sigh next to me. I know he's upset, but what else can be done?
“Okay, I guess that makes financial sense. And speaking of money... what about ours?”
“Kennedy!” Dom chides her.
“What? It's a valid question!”
“It is a valid question,” Lisa interjects. “The answer is that you'll all receive the rest of your guaranteed salary, likely sometime in the next week. The points and residuals are obviously off the table, as there won't be any profits to share.”
Kennedy sighs. I could have guessed that, but she's still upset. I don't blame her in a way, no one wants to lose money. But there's nothing anyone can do about it.
“That's better than only coming away with what we've already got.”
“I'm sure there's a clause for something like this in the contracts, right?” Dom asks Lisa.
“There is, there are many reasons why a film might be shelved. Most contracts these says ensure actors are paid their guarantee regardless.” Both Dom and Kennedy nod. Mikey seems bored, he's a bit older and probably knew all of this already.
Neil, the lawyer, shifts in his seat a little. “Alright, now that the film business has been discussed, there is the issue of Mr. Stone's allegations. We-”
“If you'll pardon me for just a moment, Mr. Greywood,” Lisa interrupts. Neil nods. “I have a bit of my own job to do before you get into things.”
“Of course.”
Lisa faces the four of us. “This hasn't made it to the press yet, but it will soon. All of us need to be cautious in what we say when we are asked. And we will be asked. My advice to all of you is to give no comment. We don't want any offhand comments to create legal issues.”
“I mean, we can't comment anyway. All you've told us is there have been accusations. You haven't told us exactly what he's accused of doing. Can you do that? Like, is it allowed?” Kennedy speaks fast, like she tends to do when she's irritated. I'm glad she asked, because I wanted to know too, but I couldn't make myself say anything. Detective Morrison and Neil glance at each other, then towards me, hesitant. Now I force myself to say something.
“You don't have to tiptoe around me, you know. If you're allowed to tell us, just tell us. Although if you're concerned about my reaction, could you please explain why I had to be here for this at all? I didn't work on the movie.”
“That's a damn good question.” Dom allows himself to glare. Detective Morrison puts a hand up defensively.
“Alright, alright. I apologize Mrs... Lancaster?” I nod, I kept my name after marriage. “To answer your first question... the first woman complainant alleges Mr. Stone attempted to rape her.” I take a deep breath, and Dom squeezes my hand again. I am instantly sorry I asked. He starts to explain more but I can't hear any details. It's like my brain is blocking it out to protect me. All I can think of at the moment is being shoved down onto a table and...
“Bree?”
Dom's voice breaks me out of the memory. I shake it clear from my head. “Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
“Yes. Fine. I'm sorry... I just...” I shake my head again.
“It's okay, you don't have to explain.”
I nod again and sit back in my seat. “Please, go on. I'm okay.”
Morrison hesitates a moment, then looks at his notes. “As I was saying... the other two women allege some pushing around, as if trying to corner them, and forcible kissing. One showed us pictures of a bruise on her wrist she says came from the altercation.”
“Is that all the evidence there is?” Dom asks quietly.
“We're still investigating. LAPD has a few leads to check out, I can't discuss those unless they pan out.”
“That's fair.”
“Now, to answer your second question, Ms. Lancaster, we asked you to be here because you were on set and around Mr. Stone enough at events for us to want to ask you, as well as Ms. Street, if Mr. Stone has ever done or said anything inappropriate towards you?”
Kennedy jumps in before I can take a breath to speak. “No. Not at all. We worked together for weeks and he was a complete professional with me.”
Morrison nods, then turns back to me. “I don't think so. I only met him a handful of times, and I was never alone with him.” Morrison nods and makes a note into a notepad I only just noticed he was holding. He must have pulled it out of his jacket pocket. Something comes to mind. “Well...” Dom leans over and looks at me concerned. “There was the wrap party, where he hugged me and did the dumb Hollywood cheek kiss thing. I admit I was a little uncomfortable with the contact, but that was probably a me thing and not a him being inappropriate thing.”
“Well, given the details the three women shared with us, I think if he had been inappropriate with you, you would be certain. It was described as very.... overt.”
“Okay... then I have to say no.”
Morrison nods and makes another note. “And Mr. Easton... did you ever see or hear Mr. Stone doing or saying anything inappropriate, either to yourself, or any female?”
“Not that I can think of. A few of us guys would joke around with the crew, but nothing I was around for ever crossed any lines.”
“No one seemed uncomfortable around him? That's for all of you.”
“Not that I could tell.”
“Me either.”
Mikey just shook his head no.
“Alright, thank you for that. And one more question... if anything comes up in the investigation that requires us to ask you anything else, is it alright for me to contact you?”
“Of course. We'll give you our numbers.” In fact, Dom reached into his pocket and pulled out one of his cards, then a pen to scribble my number on the back.
“Same for me, honey.”
“Not a problem.”
Morrison closes his notepad and gives us a tight grin. “Thank you. Sorry to have brought up some unpleasant memories for you,” he directs to me.
“You're just doing your job.” I give him a weak smile.
Before ending the meeting, both Lisa and Neil Greywood remind us to please make no comments when the allegations hit the media. Everyone stands up, shakes hands, and leaves Lisa's office. On the way out, I grab Kennedy's arm.
“Hey babe...”
“What is it, honey?”
“I just... he really never.... with you?”
Kennedy shakes her head in certainty. “Never. I'm absolutely flabbergasted about this, I would have never thought he'd....” She shakes her head again, this time in disbelief. “Then again, they always say its the ones you never suspect.”
“Yeah.... sorry, I just had to ask.”
“No, of course. I get it. Try not to think about it too much, okay? You have that little sweetheart at home to take care of.” I smile. “Gotta go honey, plane to catch. Kisses!” Kennedy blows a kiss to both me and Dom, then turns with a flourish and hurries down the hallway to the elevator.
I look up at Dom. “Do you believe her?”
“Who, Kennedy?” I nod. “Yeah... I don't see any reason not to. But just because a guy acts decent with some women doesn't mean he never tried to hurt others.”
“Right...”
Dom grabs my hand. “Kennedy is right though, don't over think it. You'll just give yourself a panic attack.”
That's not an exaggeration, I have done that a few times in the last year. “I'll try.”
* * * * *
Later at home, I'm sitting in the nursery with Heath, rocking him after a bottle, trying to get him to sleep. Despite the fact that both Dom and Kennedy told me not to think about it, I am. I'm racking my memory, trying to think if Elias Stone ever made any kind of inappropriate move or comment or even a look, towards me. I can't think of a single questionable thing. As Dom said though, that didn't mean anything. I knew that. Heath wiggles in my arms, and lets out a tiny sigh. I look down at him, and he's finally asleep. I smile at my son, looking so peaceful and comfortable in my arms. There was a silver lining in this canceled movie situation – at least for me. It means that Dom doesn't have to leave in a few days for a week as was planned. There's no film to promote anymore. I drop a light kiss on Heath's forhead.
“Daddy's staying home, Nugget. How do you like that?”
No response. Of course not, he's only 5 weeks old. But Momma loves it.