Breakdown 10-27-22 #1
{{Saturday, July 30
Las Vegas
FanFest}}
It feels so good to be around wrestling again! Yeah, I know I technically have been, since I've been working out at the Academy and helping out in Amy's classes a few days a week, but it's not the same. This is an SCW production, the biggest one of the year. This is Rise to Greatness weekend! I was so excited when Sasha D contacted me about making an appearance at FanFest, and asked if me and my family wanted to attend the show. Obviously I agreed to everything. Dom, Heath, Nora, and I flew out this past Thursday, to ensure we were settled into our rooms and rested for everything kicking off yesterday. My appearance is today, so we had Friday free. We walked around FanFest – in the backstage area, of course – catching up with people and introducing Heath to them. Amy had brought Jamison along, I think she feels he is her next 'success' and she wanted him to get a taste of things. Nora walked around with us, on standby to take Heath away if he got overstimulated, cranky, hungry, messy diaper, etc. I was nervous at first about her taking him away from us to take care of whatever he needed, but after the second or third time I felt comfortable with it, and Nora could do no wrong.
So far, today had been much the same. Our little group arrived at the venue, we were led to a room they called a dressing room, but looked more like an office the venue had set aside for us to get ready before our appearances. There was a stiff-looking couch, a few folding chairs, and a table. There was also a mini fridge stocked with bottled water, so that was a nice touch. My appearance was at 2PM, and obviously I couldn't take Heath with me out there. Far too many people, and far too much of a chance of fans taking pictures of him. I don't want that. I want to keep him as private and protected as I possibly can. He's not the celebrity, I am. And I never want him to have to deal with the kinds of media garbage I've been through. Sure, he's just three months old now, but once he grows up he might not like the idea of his face being all over the world before he ever had the opportunity to consent to it. I'm sure there will be a few 'leaks' snapped by sneaky fans or asshole paparazzi, but I'm determined to do my best to keep those as few and far between as I can.
My appearance was set for two hours, but the line was so long it became closer to three. Staff had closed the line and tried to rush me to stay within the two hours, but I wasn't about to let the fans be rushed. After the third glare, staff backed down and let me do as I pleased. Which meant talking to each person, taking a pic how they wanted, and signing one of the 8x10s I had available, and whatever item they brought, if they brought one. I was amused to see a few still-boxed 'me' dolls that had been made a few years ago. I didn't even have mine still in the box, she stands on a doll stand over the mantle in the living room, where all my wrestling items are on display. Anyway, after every fan had been met a walked away happy, nearly three hours had gone by. A staff member told me her supervisor was upset with her for that, and I told her to tell her supervisor to speak to me, because I insisted on not being rushed. I hoped to save that girls job.
After my appearance, I was a little tired, but happy. I wasn't sure how I would be received since I had been away for so long, and maybe a lot of people still felt some kind of way about me. I know I had said and done some pretty terrible things over the years. But they showed up. And it makes my heart happy. I make my way back to my 'dressing room' where Dom and Nora are waiting with Heath. When I walk in, Dom turns, our son in his arms. Nora isn't there, though.
“Hey baby.” I walk over with a big smile directed at Heath. “And hello to you too, big boy!” Heath grins at me. I could just melt. “Where's Nora?”
“She went to get something to eat. She's bringing me back some nachos.”
“Ooh, nachos sound good. I want some. Lets go find her.”
Dom agrees, and we leave the room. Going down the hallway we walk past several SCW stars who are either just done with their appearances like me, or getting ready for one. I'm not sure which is the case for the woman we're currently approaching though. The venue is large and there's a good chance she was just across the massive room from me. Also, I went over my time, so its impossible to tell. In the past, I would have either turned my head up as I passed by, or maybe even turned around and gone the other way on seeing her, but not today. Today, I see her with her wife and children around, and before I can talk myself out of it, I head in their direction.
“Bree?” Dom sounds concerned.
“It'll be okay. Just follow with him.”
Dom says nothing else, staying a few steps behind me as we approach the family. None of them see me as I walk up.
“Selena?”
The white-haired SCW World Champion spins around, that braid swinging a bit. She looks stunned to see me.
“Bree?”
Deanna, her wife, takes the two youngest children, a boy and a girl, by the hands and pulls them a step or two backwards. The oldest steps behind the little girl, putting her hands on her shoulders. That child is nearly as tall as Jaina, and I don't think she's even ten yet, if I remember right. I put my hands up palms out, as a sort of peace offering.
“I'm not looking to start trouble. I-”
“I didn't think you were. We've had a few civil Twitter exchanges. I'm just surprised you came up to me, is all. What can I do for you?”
“Um, nothing, really. Just listen a few minutes?”
“Sure...” Selena still seems skeptical. Honestly, so am I. But I feel like something higher is telling me to do this, that it will be good for me. So...
“Okay, so... it's an understatement to say that you and I have never really gotten along-”
“I'll definitely agree to that.”
I grin a little. “-and a lot of that was because of me. Or rather, my attitude. I-”
“Bree, you don't have to ap-”
“I'm not apologizing. I'm acknowledging that the things I said back then were how I felt at the time. But I also want to make clear... I'm not that person anymore. A lot changed.” I see Selena glance over my shoulder, where Dom is standing, holding our sleeping son. I grin acknowledging that I know she's seen him. “Not just in my life, but in me.”
Selena smiles, with a single nod. “I did notice that you seemed to be... taking a different path, not long before you stepped back. I always had hopes that would happen one day. You're far too talented to waste it on... well, whatever you were doing before.”
“Thanks for that. So, I know it's probably a lot to ask, but I was hoping that maybe you and I could just... leave the past where it is?”
The Champion's bright blue eyes widen a little. “Start over, you mean?”
“Not necessarily start over. I've always believed that you can't erase the past. You just learn from it and move on. That's what I'm trying to do. Learn from everything that's happened. Things I've done, things that have been done to me. I'm planning a comeback here soon, and I'd really like it if I could walk into the locker room and not have to worry about past rivalries being reignited. Sort of like a clean slate. Again, I know its a lot to ask, but-”
“I don't see why we can't do that.” Selena smiles. I feel my jaw slack. I half expected her to tell me off. “As I said before, I saw you starting to turn things around, or at least try, last year. It takes a strong person to see that a change needs to be made, and then actually do it. Even stronger to ask the people who are probably least likely to give you a second chance, to do just that. I can see that strength in you, I always knew it was there. If you can recognize that and make the request, the least I cam do is agree. I won't bring up any ancient history, I'll give you my word on that.”
Selena offers me her hand. I see Deanna behind her, surprise on her face. She's let go of the younger kids, though. I take Selena's hand and shake it.
“I really appreciate it. And listen, I'm fully aware that you and I are most likely never going to be the best of friends... or even really friends... but I just want to move past this.”
“Move forward. I understand. I will say this though... never say never. Your best friend is Sienna Swann and I remember when you tried to hurt each other over the Women's Championship.”
“You want to get into a plane crash with me, is that what you're saying?” It took something of that magnitude, near-death, to get Sienna and me to stop fighting and be friends.
“I'll pass on the near death experience, thanks. Just don't write anything off, that's all I'm saying.”
“Fair enough.”
“I do have one request of you in return...” A small smile forms on her face.
“Yes?”
“I would very much like to be introduced to that handsome young man behind you, and I'm not talking about your husband.”
I can't help but giggle. “Of course.” I turn, and find Dom trying very hard not to laugh. He hands me a now-awake Heath, and I turn back to Selena. “Here you go... Mister Heath Teller, at your service.”
Selena wiggles her fingers in front of him. “Hello, you handsome boy!” Heath smiles at her, and reaches out towards her. Selena sticks one finger out, and he grabs it. “Oh, a strong grip already!”
“It really is, it's a pain when he gets a handful of my hair.”
Selena laughs. “I know how that is, my three did the same.” She glances back at her children, and then waves them over. Deanna gives her a look, Selena nods. Deanna nudges the kids forward. “Here, I don't think you've ever been properly introduced. I'm sure you remember my oldest, Elsianna.” I've seen her at shows before. The young girl gives me a pretty smile. She looks remarkably like her mother. “And here we have my young man David, and the baby girl Amiliah.” The two youngest smile and give me timid waves.
“Hi there, I'm happy to meet you all.”
I realize that Heath is still holding Selena's finger, she made her kids' introductions like that. Talk about multitasking. But then, she is an experienced mother. She turns back to me and Heath and smiles again. “There, now we're all acquainted.”
“Your babies are beautiful.”
“Thank you.”
“Thanks.” I am surprised Deanna spoke to me. I give her a smile in return. Selena tries to pull her hand away from Heath, but he won't let go of her finger.
“This one really is strong!”
“I think he likes you.”
“Would it be alright if I held him?”
My anxiety clicks on, full throttle. I try not to show it though. “Um... okay. Just for a minute though, he really isn't used to strangers yet.”
“Oh, it'll be alright, Mommy and Daddy are right here.” I reluctantly hold him out a bit, and Selena lifts him up. My stomach is in my throat, but Heath laughs as she rests him in the crook of her arm, facing out, in a seated position. “See? Mommy's right there. Aren't you the sweetest boy?”
“He definitely likes you.” I start to calm down, it's not like Selena was going to run away with my son. That was just crazy.
“Alright, there we go, back to Mommy.” Selena hands Heath back to me, and I rest him on my shoulder, holding him close. “He's about three months, right?”
“Yes, exactly three months today. This is his first major trip away from home. Well, around a lot of people he doesn't know.”
“He seems to be handling the excitement well. Are you going to the show tomorrow night?”
“We are, SCW gave us a suite.”
“That's good of them.”
Heath starts to wiggle a little, I can tell he's working up to start fussing. “Well, it seems he's almost had enough for now. We should get going.” I turn and hand him off to Dom, who immediately starts gently bouncing him. That usually stems the fussy tide for a few minutes.
“Of course.”
“Thanks for talking to me instead of telling me where to go.”
“You don't have to thank me for that. I'm always willing to listen when someone wants to speak rationally. I may not see you again this weekend, so good luck when you decide to return.”
“Thank you. And good luck tomorrow night. You've really been a great champion for this company, and I'd love to see that continue.”
“I appreciate that. I'll give it my best, as always.” We both smile.
“That's all we can do, right?”
“Exactly.”
“Well, we'll leave you to enjoy the rest of your day. Bye.”
“Bye Bree. It was good seeing you. And you too, Dom.”
“Likewise.” Dom gives her a polite nod.
I give a wave and turn to leave, before I say something else and drag this out any further. Dom and I walk away about a dozen steps before he speaks.
“Well, that was interesting. What prompted you to do that?”
“I felt like I had to. She was my biggest rival, outside of your brothers, and I just didn't want to walk right back into that.”
“Preemptive strike?”
I laugh. “Nothing so calculated as that. I just... like I told her, I want to start as fresh as I can when I make my return. If I'm gonna be asking everyone to give me another chance, it only makes sense that I do the same for the ones who crossed me before, right?”
“Yeah, I suppose you're right. I just never thought I'd see the day you and Selena Frost of all people got along.”
“Stranger things have happened. Like both your brothers being at our wedding.”
Dom laughs. “That was more surprising, I'll give you that. Oh look, I see Nora in the nacho line!”
Dom points with his free hand. I'm suddenly starving.
“Oh my God, I could eat two bowls. Let's catch her before she orders.”
We hurry our pace and meet Nora in line. Mmmm. Nachos.
{{Monday, August 1
Kenner, LA}}
Rise to Greatness is over, and it was a mixed bag. Firstly, Datura is Adrenaline Champion! I am still very concerned about her involvement with Holly and Giovanni, but super proud of her for becoming a champion. Lizzy always let her doubts get in the way before but this time she overcame. On the other hand, it turned out that Selena was unable to remain champion. I was upset, partially because Adam Allocco is kind of an asshole, but also partially because maybe a tiny part of me wanted to possibly face Selena one more time, with the title on the line. But, it wasn't meant to be. Not that I planned in jumping right back into the World Championship conversation, I need to shake some rust off before I even think about any titles, much less that one. It was just the tiny irrational part of my brain that thought “what if?” Its the same irrational voice that whines when Heath is too far away from me.
We got home about an hour ago. It's late afternoon, and Nora is upstairs with Heath now, getting him down for a nap. He can't seem to sleep on the plane much, I think it's the air pressure difference. Babies are much more sensitive to that than adults are. Dom and I sit at the kitchen island, with cups of chamomile tea. It's very relaxing after travel.
“So, are you ready to do all that travel every week again?”
“Travel, no. Get back in the ring and into the mix? Yeah... yeah I think I am.”
“It was being around it all again, wasn't it?”
“I mean, I was always going to go back, baby. I stood in the middle of the ring and promised them I would.” Dom knows better than anyone how I feel about making and keeping promises. I don't break them, not if it's at all under my control.
“I remember, I was there.” He grins a little. It's true, he stood beside me in the ring as I announced my pregnancy and leave of absence. As well as the promise. “But you always left the return timing open-ended. Do you have something more solid in mind now?”
“Not like.... a specific date. But I think sooner rather than later. Maybe not long after SCW returns from break. I have to talk to Sasha though. I tried this weekend, she was far too busy. I guess I should have known better. But I can reach out soon.”
“You absolutely should. I haven't seen you light up like you did over the weekend in a long time. You belong out there, cakes. As much as I'd like to keep you home forever, it would be a disservice to you, and the world, to keep you out of the spotlight for any longer than necessary.”
“Dom... you're such a flatterer.” I smirk over my mug just before sipping the hot tea.
“Well, I can be, but I'm serious. That place needs you to light it up.”
“You really think so?”
“I know so. I bet Sasha will work you in just as soon as possible. All you have to do is tell her you'll be ready.”
I look down into my tea. I see a few loose flower buds floating around. I know Dom is right. Not that SCW needs me, I might have believed that once, but now I don't think the company really needs any particular person more than another.
But I need SCW.
I love my husband, I love my son, they are my family, my blood. But wrestling is in my blood, too. It has been since as far back as I can remember. Dom is right. It's time. I look up at him and smile.
“I can be ready.”
I'll call Sasha's office tomorrow.